Love shouldn’t hurt like that

At an outdoor restaurant, a lady got smacked on the face by a man that appeared to be her lover. He didn’t stop there. He was yelling at her and dragging her by the hair too. One concerned gentleman walked up to the abuser and tried to mediate. They got into a heated conversation and even almost got into a brawl, but the good samaritan was no match for the abuser. The abuser gave in and left with his girlfriend.

Later that night, the abuser and his guys tracked the good samaritan down to his neighbourhood and beat him to his death. The next day, he was seen with the same person the good samaritan was trying to help — the lady.

It’s hard to understand why people in abusive relationships stay there. Why is it not obvious to them that they are being abused? Why can’t they just get up one day and leave? Honestly, it is really complex to understand.

Getting hurt in a relationship isn’t love. It’s dangerous. It’s violence. It can happen to anybody, no matter how smart or popular or strong or sophisticated you are. It happens to girls and to boys. It happens in same-sex relationships.

You have the right to be treated with respect. You don’t deserve to be harmed physically or emotionally by another person. Violence and abuse are unacceptable in any relationship. Love shouldn’t hurt like that.

Abuse erodes the confidence and self-dependency of those involved. When you have experienced something for a long time, it feels normal to you, no matter how bad it looks to others. At that point, all that matters is your view.

The minds of victims are so manipulated that they often interpret the abusive actions of their partners as acts of love. Victims make excuses and hold on to the good aspects of the relationship as compensation. “It was all my fault,” they sometimes claim when confronted with the fact that they are being abused. In extreme cases, they can even shut themselves away from the people trying to help.

The story of the good samaritan that lost his life while trying to help is a sad one, but these people need all the help they can get. Abused people need help no matter how dangerous helping them can be.

It might seem like they want to stay abused, but it’s only because they don’t know how to get out or maybe they are yet to see the light. Love shouldn’t have to hurt.

My heart goes out to all the people in abusive relationships. I hope and pray they one day see the light and get out before it consumes them.

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